Xemnas has fangirls?
by The- MillieIshtarMotou
Summary: Another Questions fic. XD This time...find out what The Leader REALLY has to say. Anonymous questions now accepted!
1. Chapter 1

Hello again people some of you may remember me as the annoying fangirl from those Axel Q&A or Ask Demyx. (Or possibly from Xigbar's answers) Well…This time (yet again. with permission from Anime-Fan-Girlz and schoolgirl-cheesesculpture) I'm writing for Xemnas. He's gonna answer your questions. (I mean seriously...what does he get up to in his free time?)

A/N: Ask Demyx, Axel Q&A and Roxas Says are property of schoolgirl cheesescuplture.  
Ask Marluxia and Ask Zexion are property of Anime-Fan-Girlz

Xigbar's Answers and Xemnas has fangirls? are property of -The- MillieIshtarMotou (yes...me!)

All rights reserved.

Disney and Squeenix own everything...except the plotlines, (they belong to the fangirls) XD


	2. Chapter 2

From: Anime-Fan-Girlz  
Subject: Personal Questions

I have a few questions for the Superior!

1-Why do you talk so slow?  
2-Do you and Saix have something going on?

And I think there was one more but I can't remember it. Hehe, it'll just give me another excuse to pester you later.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

To the Anime-Fan-Girlz

1) I do not talk slowly. I just prefer to go steady.  
2) That's clearly none of your business.

Indeed.

Signed,  
The Superior  
(Nobodies can't Love, although we show the feeling well)

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

From: ArtemisBlack555

Subject: …

HIYA!

1.Seriously, do YOU know who started the whole Mansex stuff? I mean, you DID know about that right? I think it was Axel...  
2.Do you like pie?  
3.Rock or pebble?  
4.Who in the Organization do you hate the most? I NEED TO KNOW!  
5.Do you know the muffin man?

I'm done, Mansex...I mean Xemnas...Bye Superior

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

To ArtemisBlack555

1) I believe it was the perverted Fangirls…

2) Saïx's Moon pie is delicious.

3) I am far too busy to worry about such matters.

4) Number Eight tends to get on my last nerves

5) Indeed.

Since I don't have a heart, I can't feel sadness. I do however have rage.

Signed,  
The Superior  
(Nobodies can't Love, although we show the feeling well)


	3. Chapter 3

From: _**XedarlesFangirl**_

Subject: General Organization Business

Dear Superior Xemnas Sir!

1. How do you chose organization members?  
2. Do you still refer to it as organization XI even without Roxas?  
3. Will there ever be more members?  
4. Who causes the most trouble?

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To XedarlesFangirl,

Thank you, at least you know how to respect your superiors.

1) Top Secret Initiation Tasks.

2) Roxas is still with us…so yes. It is still Organization Thirteen.

3) Indeed

4) My Daughter and Axel. -sighs-

Signed,

The Superior

(Nobodies can't Love, although we show the feeling well)

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From: _**Anime-Fan-Girlz**_

Subject: …

GUESS WHAT XEMMY?! I REMEMBERED THE QUESTION I FORGOT! Oh, and I have more questions for you! Rather random ones but hey, after all the trouble you put me through in KH2, I HAVE to get on your nerves. Aren't you just so excited you can jump off the walls?! Wait, no... that's me. You're probably not excited.

1-Why are you always ranting about Kingdom Hearts?  
2-Would you feel creeped out if I told you that I actually think you're kinda cute?  
3-What's your favorite color?  
4-Did George Lucas ever sue you for using aerial blades? I mean c'mon, they have an uncanny similarity to lightsabers.  
5-Speaking of lightsabers, have you seen Star Wars?  
6-Regarding a question that someone once asked Zexion, How come you had to go with some really intricate and complicated plan to get your heart back when you just could've defeated your own Heartless and got it back?  
7-Do you like oatmeal?  
8-What about carrots?  
9-... MANSEX! LAWLS! I know not a question... but I just had to.

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Indeed I'm not…My daughter, Ilixelm, has forced me to answer in fear of letting her somebody cry.

1) Oh My Kingdom Hearts…Soon...Warriors of the Keyblade will bring more hearts.

2) I can't feel 'creeped' out, rather…flattered. Thank you.

3) Blue (It's the color of Saïx's gorgeous soft hair)

4) –sends Glare of Deathly Doom®- Saïx Attack! –Saïx appears seemingly out of nowhere in full berserker mode and chases after you, while Xemnas looks undoubtedly pleased-

5) I am far too busy to watch such uncanny business

6) …I like things done MY way.

7) I prefer Saïx's moon-pie

8) ….Why do they insist on calling me that?

Signed,

The Superior

(Nobodies can't Love, although we show the feeling well)


	4. Chapter 4 Special Guest!

From:_** tootsiepopgurl**_

Subject: Sephiroth this, Sephiroth that…

HIYA XEMNAS! i just have one question for you...and it might piss you off..but here goes anyway!

you do know that sephiroth is the greatest villian out there right?? i mean...his name doesnt spell mansex...and...sephiroth is hot.

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To tootsiepopgurl (what are you like a prep or something?)

Ilixelm here (yes I'm borrowing my Daddy's Computer)

You should learn to respect your Superiors. My Daddy is one million times better than Sephiroth…Now go away before I get Voodoo on your ass. Or possibly Papa, Yes Saïx! -evil smirk-

Ilix.

----

Ilixelm, you shouldn't have taken my computer without permission, however I am grateful that you have defended me.

-cough Love cough-

Xemnas.

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From: _**Obsessive Gamer Chick**_  
Subject: Four Questions

Yo Xemnas.  
1. Vexen Popsicle or Barbecued Axel?  
2. Chicken or Beef?  
3. Rabid Fangirl or Sugar High Fangirl?  
4. Favorite dish made by Zexion?

Sorry, I usually have fairly normal questions, but I'm in a random mood. Just let me know if I annoy you, ok?

Obsessive Gamer Chick

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Dear Obsessive Gamer Chick,

Hello there,

1) How can you barbecue a pyro? Can this be done logically? Can you teach me?

2) I quite like marinated roast beef.

3) Considering I always have Ilixelm's somebody (Millie) on a sugar high, I prefer Rabid Fangirls.

4) I don't allow Zexion to cook, I'm afraid his hair might get in the food.

Thank you and no, you haven't annoyed me.

Signed,

Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas.

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From: _**Taegra Live**_

Subject: Ten Questions

Xemnas,  
1) How is it like to run Organization XI? I mean, do things run smoothly...or end up blowing up in your face?  
2) If you could kill Sora in any way possible, how would you kill him?  
3) Did you honestly fall for Riku and Mickey's Organization XI looks or did you know all along that it was really them?  
4) Why did you steal Ansem the Wise's name?  
5) If you could rule over any world (Pick only one please) which would it be and why?  
6) If I told you that I worshiped Organization XI, would you be...er...for a lack of words...concerned?  
7) Why is it called "The World That Never Was" when it is clearly there; therefore, it had to be?  
8) Am I annoying you?  
9) How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?  
10) Would you ever consider converting to Cheeseism? It is the best religion in the world. Our God is a Macaroni(I wish I could spell) and Cheese God named Cheeseist. Of course, he is nowhere near as amazing and does not deserve as much worship as Kingdom Hearts...  
That's it...for now. Later! Taerga Live

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Dear Taegra Live,

1) Most things run smoothly, however I usually find that the first explosion is from Axel or Xigbar.

2) I'd allow my daughter to deal with him as she has got quite the imagination.

3) Of course I knew it was them. Square Enix and Disney, however, made me look stupid.

4) We are technically the same person.

5) The World That Never Was because I wouldn't like to live anywhere else.

6) I'd be a little concerned, yes. However Millie also worships us, so it's nothing new.

7) We're not supposed to exist thus, nor the world.

8) Not at all. –Xemnas smile-

9) She sells sea shells on the sea shore?

10) …No…Oh Kingdom Hearts…ignore her meaningless efforts. For I worship you…Oh My Kingdom Hearts.

Signed,

Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas.

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From: _**Anime-Fan-Girlz**_

Subject: Zexion, Marluxia and seriousness 

Whew, I've managed to hide in my inpenetrable attic of... um... attic-ness. Saïx won't be able to catch me here... Zexion told me to tell you that he says hi and Marluxia told me to tell you to get him out of there. Anyways, onto all seriousness.

GASPETH! YOU'VE NEVER SEEN STAR WARS!? BLASEPHY I SAY! BLASPHEMY! If I could make this text any bigger I would, but I can't so just imagine this next blasphemy bigger. BLASEPHEMY! Dammit man, now you're making me hyperventilate! Don't you realize I have asthma!? Geez, I suppose now you're going to tell me you've never seen Lord of the Rings...

And why'd you have to go send Saïx after me? It was just a freaking yes or no question! I think someone needs to take care of that anger problem! And don't give me that "But we can't feel!" stuff. If you sent Saïx after me, then you CLEARLY have anger issues. And just for that, you get TWICE the amount of questions next time I swing around. Hehe... You brought it upon yourself. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

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Dear Anime-Fan-Girlz,

Tell That Traitor Marluxia, that he can stay there. I have always wanted a good punishment for him. Tell Zexion that I say hello back.

Oh I lied, I have watched Star Wars…it was on my first date with Saïx (How could I have forgotten?) Then he went berserk in the cinema and threatened to sue… (Oh wait now I remember!) I also have seen Lord of the Rings and I've read all the books. So no need to die…yet.

I only 'feel' the ghost feelings left alone by the misery that is caused from being a nobody.

Signed, Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas.


	5. Chapter 5

From: _**DarkEmoGirl**_

Subject: Four Questions

hi...  
1. how did you end up having a question and answer? is this willing or you were forced..?  
2. cat or dogs? i love dogs...  
3. what is your reaction when squre enix said your going to die in the game?  
4. have you played kigdom hearts 2 yourself?

goodbye for now...

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Dear DarkEmoGirl,

Hello.

1) Interesting question. This is most certainly willing, with a touch of whining from Ilixelm, Xigbar (who said I don't have nearly enough fun) and Millie (who explained in a very long winded way that she'd cry, making Ilixelm cry and so on and so forth.)

2) Neither…The Heartless make good pets.

3) Ask Saïx -smirk- Although I'm running out of places for him to hide the bones…

4) This is a highly amusing story. We were challenged by Ilixelm to try and defeat ourselves.

Xigbar failed once, (however put up a good fight and defeated himself second time round) Demyx said that he was going to turn pacifist, to which we all laughed at (Then Xigbar shot a round of his raygun, narrowly missing Demyx, Xaldin and I)

Axel lost spectacularly to himself. Xaldin defeated himself on the first round, Saïx lost to himself (claiming that he did it on purpose to protect me) and I managed to beat BOTH of my selves (considering that it took me nearly ten times each way…it wasn't THAT bad.)

That's all for now.

Signed,

Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas

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From: Neko2022

Subject: Four more questions

Dear Xemnas Sir

I have some question for you.Will you answer them for me?

1.Who is your best friend in the organization  
2.You love Kingdom Hearts,don't you  
3.When you are in you are in your shower,do you sing  
4.It's not really a question,but you are REALLY pretty

Nobodies are cool

Neko--

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Dear Neko,

I noticed and of course I will, (since I'm a powerful leader of a powerful Organization, I obviously have nothing better to do)

1) Xigbar and Saïx (best friends)

2) Mnn…my Kingdom Hearts!

3) …rarely…

4) Thank you…I think that is not an insult.

Indeed.

Signed your Superior and friend,

Xemnas

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From: CheshireCat o.Oo.o

Subject: Six Questions

Dear Xemnas,  
1) What exactly are your qualifications for running organization XI?  
2)Who's hotter Sephiroth or Saix? (like I already don't know that Answer, BIASED)  
3)The first 6 members of organization 13 were suppose to be scientists, so tell me What exactly was Xigbars field of study?  
4)What kind of music do you like?  
Oh and by the way you are hot.  
5)Why exactly are there 12 male and only one female?  
6) Why is that female a complete psycho?

Sincerely,  
The Cheshire Cat o.Oo.O  
"If you talk to the voices in your head, they will talk back. Mine yelled at me last week."

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1) Leadership skills including a nobody degree in ranting…Number Two…SAY NOTHING!

2) Saïx…Indeed.

3) Number Two had various experiments to do with underwear…you can see why I never asked questions.

4) The sound of Kingdom Hearts by the Quiet Boys… (Not to be confused with the sound of the Underground by Girls Aloud)

Thank you If I liked females…I'm sure I'd say the same.

5) I have often wondered that myself…

6) You'd better ask her yourself.

Signed,

Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas

P.S Thank you for the advice…I'll keep the voices away from me.


	6. Chapter 6

From: _**Obsessive Gamer Chick**_

Subject: Eight Questions

Hi, me again.  
Yes it is logically possible for a pyro to burn. In fact, that is how Axel dies/fades in the japanese KH2. He catches fire in his kamikaze attack. My suggestion? Slip a sleeping pill in his food and drench him in gasoline and the barbecue sauce of your choice. Then, all you have to do is get him really mad. Lol. Moving on to the questions.

1. Cake or cupcakes?

2. Riku or sora?

3. Favorite Final Fantasy Character in kh and kh2?

4. The best suggestion you've ever heard from any organization member? 

5. The worst suggestion?

6. Am I getting annoying? 

7. Hyper Demyx or very angry Roxas?

8. Do nobodies bleed? Do they sneeze? Do they use the bathroom?

Ok, I ran out of questions. Thanks a lot!!

Obsessive Gamer Chick (who rocks your socks! Ok, probably not...)

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Dear Obsessive Gamer Chick,

That is very interesting…I may have to try that…Hmm…BBQ chicken sauce sounds good. Now to answer your questions…

1) Saïx's moon cakes are quite delicious.

2) …meaning what exactly?

3) In Kingdom Hearts…I have to say…Hades…And of course…my Saïx in Kingdom Hearts Two…

4) Hmm…The best suggestion actually came from Demyx. I was thinking of a suitable punishment for Luxord. (He had gambled our live savings and had lost…although the other guy WAS cheating) and that was to sing the spice girls loud and clear (in a soundproof room just for the two of them) to make Luxord's ears bleed.

5) The worst suggestion came from Marluxia…his plan was to cover the whole worlds in flowers and scare the princesses of heart with his 'roses of doom.' Yes Marluxia…genius plan -rolls eyes- If you consider that the princesses LIKE flowers…the idiotic neophyte.

6) Not at all

7) Hyper Demyx

8) Yes, Yes and Yes…(unless you're Axel, in which case you fear water…therefore not daring too)

No comment.

Signed your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**IzzyIzzy**_

Subject: None

Dear Mr Xemnas Sir:

Subject:None,don't need a subbie!

okay,I have been wondering about this since I played KH2:

There's light and Darkness right?There's always Heartless too,  
and you say when a Heartless is made,a Nobody is made as well.So if there's always darkness,there's always Heartless!And if there's heartless, there's Nobodies!So,why are nobodies not supossed to exist if they always will be?

Also,do you know why Saix's hair is blue?Just wondering.

Peace!  
IzzyIzzy Out!

P.S:Sorry if I offended your way of thinking,it's just that's been bothering me for a while.

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Dear IzzyIzzy

It is a question even -I- have difficulty understanding and Thus, still haven't worked out. I'm afraid I cannot help us here…If Darkness is eternal and Light is eternal…Then where do we stand…we are not even supposed to exist.

No…I tend not to ask…I can tell you that he is most definitely a natural bluenet…

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas.

P.S You have not offended me.

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From: _**Procraz3dfan**_

Subject: Cutting to the chase.

Hey Xemnas,  
Let's cut to the chase.

1) Do you think the upcoming villain in Kingdom Hearts 3 can outstage you?  
2) Do Nobodies even have freetime in between missions?  
3) Did you ever read crackfics on Kingdom Hearts...if so did you even laugh?  
4) Is it possible that the ghosts of emotions in a Nobody might come from a small connection to the original heart?  
5) Do youhavae agents that are NOT Nobodies?  
6) Are Nobodies and Heartless natural enemies?

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Dear Procraz3dfan

1) Not at all. I am The Superior. The master of eternal, everlasting Darkness.

2) Indeed.

3) Indeed, An amusing one of Xigbar stoned was found earlier today…That made me laugh.

4) Highly unlikely….although not impossible

5) Yes…Millie Ishtar Motou is one of them. However it sometimes worries me when she goes on a mission with Xigbar and Demyx…simple reason…Demyx usually is carried back unconscious.

6) No…Heartless can make good house-pets

Signed

Your superior and friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**Anime-Fan-Girlz**_

Subject: Three Questions and a Rant

Oh okay, you've seen both SW and LOTR. That's good. Never ever say otherwise again or I might really have a panic attack.

Friend? Friend?! Sweet! I could tell my other friends "Guess who I'm friends with?!" and they'll all be like, "Who?" and I'll be like, "Xemnas!" And they'll be like, "Cool!" Yeah that's awesome...

And I have super good news that I'm sharing to the world! I'm gonna be an aunt! Whoo!

Anyways... since you're as close as you'll ever be to be sorry for the last time's transgressions (because I know you can't feel), I'll loosen up with questions. This also has to do with the fact that I'm not good at thinking up questions.

1-What kinda music do you like?  
2-Have you ever had to balance a checkbook?  
3-Do you like orange juice?

And... I'm out of random questions to pester you with! Bye bye for now!

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Dear Anime-Fan-Girlz

Hmm…that is not so good…maybe Vexen could give you some pills for those.

Indeed. Although I am not so good on relationships…(although Saïx and I are doing great, thank you for asking)

That's interesting.

Thank you, indeed.

1) Demyx has quite the singing voice. I like to listen to his songs

2) Indeed and I rather not mention it -shudders-

3) Banana Juice is better especially when Marluxia makes it.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**Tsubasa-Angel**_

Subject: Four Questions

Okay, Xemnas-sama. This is from, yours truly, Tsubasa-Angel.  
Here are a few questions...

1. When you say "indeed", it makes me laugh. I don't know why, but do you?  
2. Why does one of your Organization XI member,(I don't remember his name) use cards to battle? I got turned into a friggin cube when I battled him! ANd, it sucked. Because of that, he was harder to beat than you...  
3. Why are you so freakin weak? It took me like 10 minutes to beat you! My brother was in awe of my power! lol  
4. Would you prefer if I called you Xemnas-Dono(I think thats how you spell it) or Xemnas-sama?

Meaning no disrespect,  
Tsubasa-Angel

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1) I have no idea…

2) That would be number Ten Luxord, it's because he's the Gambler of Fate. He's just cool.

3) I am far from weak…you just need to learn to control your power.

4) Xemnas-Dono…seems respectful enough.

No disrespect noted.

Signed,

Your superior and Friend,

Xemnas.

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	7. Chapter 7 Another Special Guest!

From: _**Lady Isla**_

Subject: Saïx (That is I)

Hey, Xemmy-baby (do you mind if I call you "Xemmy-baby"?)

1) Do you any of the members from the Org. XI call you "Xemnas"?  
2) Do you HAVE a THING for Saix? If you do, I think you're crazy. Besides he's MINE!!  
3) If a tree falls down and there's no one around to hear it... would it still make a sound?

Ta ta for now!

-Lady Isla

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Dear Lady Isla,

Excuse me, but I am NOT 'yours' and _my Lover Xemnas_ is NOT crazy. I DO Love Xemnas and I am his. Note: I am gay and his daughter is my daughter (Vexen can do amazing things with science!)

Signed,

Saïx


	8. Chapter 8

-Is proud of my Saïx- Well…if you had read the previous chapter you would note that Saïx took over my computer…So afraid to say that Lady Isla's questions were not answered, therefore I shall answer them now. 

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From: _**Lady Isla**_

Subject: Names and Questions

Hey, Xemmy-baby (do you mind if I call you "Xemmy-baby"?)

1) Do you any of the members from the Org. XI call you "Xemnas"?  
2) Do you HAVE a THING for Saix? If you do, I think you're crazy. Besides he's MINE!!  
3) If a tree falls down and there's no one around to hear it... would it still make a sound?

Ta ta for now!

-Lady Isla

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Yes I do Indeed mind. Xigbar drives me insane with that.

1) Most don't tend to and end up calling me 'Superior'. However Xigbar, Xaldin, Vexen, Lexeuas and Saïx do.

2) I think you'll find this has been answered by my lover Saïx

3) Indeed.

Goodbye

Signed,

Xemnas.

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From: _**CheshireCat o.Oo.O**_

Subject: Seven Questions

Dear Xemnas,  
1) Have you ever found the source of the MANSEX thing or are you still trying to kill whoever started it?  
2) What DO you do with your time off?  
3) Do you have any Tattoo's? (Wow thats a random question)  
4) All in all Who is your favorite (besides Saix) Organization member??  
5) Why do you guys keep your hoods up all the time? We already know who you are. Doesn't change the fact that Sora has to fight you.  
6) Heartless make good pets?

Don't worry I've got a million questions for you. But here's the Worst. BOXERS OR BRIEFS?

Your Friend and Disciple,  
The Cheshire Cat  
"Of all the things I miss, my mind is not one of them."

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Dear The Cheshire Cat

1) Your mission, when you choose to accept it, is to hunt down, said person and report back. I shall deal with them personally.

2) I would tell you…however this would have to be 'M'-rated

3) No…though I might get one…I'll see what Saïx says.

4) Demyx…he's actually very sweet.

5) …For effect.

6) Indeed. Demyx has a baby shadow in his room I think.

-raises eyebrow- I don't see why this effects you…however I prefer boxers.

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S You have some interesting sayings.

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From: _**Muffinizer**_

Subject: Five Questions

Whee. Dear Mansex... Uh... -coff- Let's start over.  
Dear Xemnas-donodono!  
First off, you must be bored to do this, eh? Not too busy obsessing over Kingdom Hearts? -Laughs-

1. If you were to be reincarnated as a kick-butt villain in the next game (-underlines "if"-) - that is, if Squeenix loved you enough to put you back in, sarcasm sarcasm - d'you think you'd still have that seckseh hairstyle of yours? 'Cause y'know, 'sides that ebil dud voice you have, I think your hair is the reason why I'm a fangirl.

2. Xemnas-donodono, I've seen, uhh, an Ask Larxene thing around here too... D'you think yours is superior compared to that blonde nymph's Q&A? (Well, you are Number One while she's like... who cares?)

3. Say you kinda went back in time to... let's say CoM; if you had the chance, would you kick some members out and recruit any kinda villanous, magic-weilding person in their stead? (Please don't say Saix, 'cause, c'mon, we all love him.)

4. ... You sign everything with "Your Superior and friend." What's a friend to you?

5. And for the whole "Your Superior" thing, you haven't been around some Order members or the "author" of this when they were playing Tales of Symphonia, right? 'Cause those lines sound oddly familiar. I'd freak out if you started calling everyone "inferior beings." ... Oh dear.

My this was fun. Way to kill a few minutes making questions up, self. -nod-

-Muffinizer + yaoi fanservice in reality? Let chaos begin!

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Dear Muffinizer

1) Indeed, afterall…Saïx loves to run his fingers through it.

2) Indeed. I AM Superior.

3) No…I quite like my team the way they are…even Axel is bearable…and that Roxas child.

4) …Someone who does what they are told and obeys orders while looking up to me, giving respect and likes to be around.

5) No comment.

That seems plausible,

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S That sounds dangerous…

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From: _**Tsuabsa-Angel**_

Subject: Just a few things

Yay!  
Okay, Xemnas-dono, Here are my questions!  
By the way, I'm one of your FRINEDS? insert gasp here  
Yay!  
Would you like to be a somebody other then a nobody?  
Did you hear Utada Hikaru's songs for KH and KH2? What do you think of them? (And, if you have played the game, then you would have heard her)  
What do you mean by "just need to learn to control my power?"  
I have FULL control of my own awesome power! I just use them when I'm sorta hyper... But that's not what I'm talking about...  
Ah, well. A random moment...that I am PROUD of! Yeah!

Again, No disrespect,  
from Tsuabsa-Angel  
EEK! I'm your friend! YAY!

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Dear Tsuabsa-Angel,

Indeed, you are it seems.

Well I'd like to have my heart back…

Beautiful… (We are talking about Simple and Clean here right?)

Yes…well…You couldn't have beaten me unless you cheated…

Good for you…

No disrespect noted,

Signed,

Your superior and friend,

Xemnas 


	9. Chapter 9

From: _**Tsubasa-Angel**_

Subject: Another Rant

Gawd! You see through EVERYTHING, don't you, Xemnas-dono! But, the fact is, I did NOT cheat! It was my millionth time playing through KH2! That's why! I knew every move you used, and I used a combination of keyblades that I thought worked best! And, it worked! When you fight a person who uses the same strategy everytime you fight the person, it sorta gets easier to beat that person, in this case, you. But, that was beacause of the game,wasn't it? You are SO much better than that! Why else would you be leader of the awesomest orginization EVER! Yay for Xemnas-dono! 3 cheers! Yay!

No disrespect, from your friend, who considers you a superior above all superiors,  
Tsubasa-Angel!

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Dear Tsubasa-Angel,

If you played the game a million times over, then of course you're going to defeat me. Because you knew my every move…Therefore you still cheated. Playing the game over and over again…so that you would win within ten minutes. Indeed I am better than that ask Saïx, if you don't believe me. Thank you.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas.

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From: _**Procraz3dfan**_

Subject: Four Questions and a post script

Xemnas,

1) Did you like how you were portrayed in the game...if there was anything to change what would it be?

2) Do you allow other Nobodies to get in tune of their ghost feelings? What if it fell against your best interest?

3) This obsession of Kingdom Hearts...Did you really just want your heart back or was there a world domination motive underlying that.

4) How do you chose which member goes on a specific mission?

Signed Procraz3dfan

Post Script: I hope that you are content ( since to can't technically feel emotion) with your life

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Dear Procraz3dfan

1) I would have preferred it if the didn't make me so predictable

2) Indeed I do. Otherwize it's not fair on Xigbar. Did I mention we're quite good friends?

3) Laughable, I only wanted two things, My Saïx and My Heart.

4) I go by their abilities and what the mission requires. (I do however which that Square Enix had reborn Marluxia and put him there instead…or possibly Lexeuas)

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S As Long as I have my ghost feelings, My Saïx and Ilixelm…my non-existant life is worth living.

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From:_**Sofricus Aurora Zakuro**_

Subject: Yaoi, Yuri and The Tin Man.

My dear Superior,

Only a moment of your time, and I shall try to be literate, unlike many of your questioners.  
1. Do you prefer Yaoi (boylove,) Yuri (girllove,) or Het?  
2. Do you like waffles?  
3. Have you heard of the Wizard of Oz?? Because one of the characters (the Tin Man) doesn't have a heart but wants one. would you consider letting him into the Organization?  
Sincerely,  
Sofricus  
P.S. I think you are really cool but your evil glare when I first saw you in hollow bastion (after I beat Demyx) kind of creeped me out and made me lose sleep

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Dear Sofricus Aurora Zakuro

I am not yours…however do continue.

Why Thank you…someone finally understands me.

1) I prefer Yaoi…although Ilixelm is always reading Yuri…Oh My Kingdom Hearts! Does this mean she's gay too?

2) Ilixelm makes waffles taste delicious! Axel just burns them…

3) No…most definitely not…

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S You poor thing…

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From: _**Ms. Bubbles**_

Subject: Saïx

OI!

Why Saix?  
You could've done so much better!  
I mean, seriously, he's ugly.

(Saix, don't kill me! I know Tai-Chi!)

I should run now, yeah?

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Dear Ms. Bubbles

HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY LOVER! It just goes to show how fangirls can be jealous over one as beautiful as he is. What's the matter dear? Can't have beautiful long hair like that? -smirks- My Saïx is not ugly. Again…you are just consumed by the jealously…powerless to control it…just like my former teacher…Ansem.

My dearest Saïx…Don't worry about her…Ilixelm will deal with her…

-Ilixelm smirks as she readies her Voodoos-

Yes…run while you can…Voodoo is a strong power. -Smirk-

Signed,

Your Superior,

Xemnas

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From: _** (0.0) **_

Subject: Six Questions

1-is your hair natural or did u dye it?  
2-what is your favorite world besides the world that never was?  
3-Are you being held hostage? if you are tell me where so i can taunt you...  
4-why do you keep on ansking riku if he's jelouse of sora in one of the final battles?  
5-why aren't there more girl nobodies in the organization you sexist jerk?  
6- and what does your room look like, dare i ask?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1) My hair is natural

2) Hmm…Not sure…We went on a vacation to Pleasure Island at one stage…that was near disastrous…Never drink beer from that place again…You might get turned into a donkey…

3) No…My daughter thought it would be best for my anger management (and my sanity) if I spoke to people outside the Organization.

4) …Curiosity…

5) I AM NOT A SEXIST JERK! Blame Square Enix and Disney.

6) THAT'S PRIVATE

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**CheshireCat o.Oo.O**_

Subject: Eight Questions

Side Note:I am now in the process of finding said person (The whole Mansex thing) and setting them on fire.  
Woot fire END SIDE NOTE:

Dear Xemnas,  
It is very consoling to hear that you think of me as a friend. However it is unfortunate that you are gay. A lot of disappointed Xemnas fans but a lot of happy YAOI fans. Oh well Cest La Vie.  
Ah now to the questions.  
1) Is Axel gay? (Seeing as you and Saix are together I am moving on to my next choice in Men.)  
2) What kind of books do you read?  
3) Do you celebrate Holidays? (Christmas, Thanksgiving, Etc.)  
4) What is it with Silver Haired Men being the Enemy? (I like Silver Haired Men thank you very much)  
5) If you had a chance to fight Sora again, wouldn't you just go straight into the Ultimate Form?  
6) If I were to visit out of the blue one day, What would be your reaction?  
7) Why don't you redecorate the Castle that Never Was? (Please tell me you wouldn't put flowers everywhere because that would just drive me nuts.)  
8) Do you guys ever Take Vacations? And where do you go if you do?

Your Friend and Disciple,  
The Cheshire Cat  
"No one truly knows the extent of a broken heart, Until you have lost yours." (Laments of the Cheshire Cat)

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Dear CheshireCat o.Oo.O,

In response to your side note: Thank you…much appreciated

Indeed

1) I do not think so…however he most likely to be in denial and therefore may not own up to it.

2) Romance novels and Shakespeare

3) Only Halloween and our non-existant birthdays…

4) My thoughts exactly…(except I prefer natural blue hair)

5) Indeed…Although I had to follow the script…damn Enix…

6) I'd make sure you stuck by Ilixelm at all times…I don't trust the others and Saïx would be busy…

7) …Oh My Kingdom Hearts NO! That would just be the kind of antics Number Eleven would do…-shudders-

8) Indeed…last year we went to Halloween Town…that was…interesting…to say the least.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S Indeed…Thank you.


	10. Chapter 10

From: _**SoraXNamine**_

Subject: Wow!

Oh-ma-gosh this was so awesome! luved it!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear SoraXNamine…

Thank you!

Signed,

Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: …Saïx?

Subject: The Date?

Hello my lover it's me,Saix.Are we still up tonight?I can't wait!Your mine and i'm yours ok!Buh bye

Your lover Saïx

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To whoever you may be…you can't fool me…You are not my Saïx! Let me explain why there are several flaws to your so-called 'Identity'.

1) You're far too casual with your sentence structure.

2) Your spelling of 'bye-bye' is appalling.

3) Saïx would never announce our private affairs out loud

And Lastly,

That tone is a lot like Xigbar's…casual and disrespectful…I know Saïx to be better than that.

Signed,

The Superior.

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From: _**Tsubasa-Angel**_

Subject: apologies

Okay, Xemnas-dono, sorry about that rant...

Anyway, why Saix... what do you see in him? (I mean, no offense, just curiosity)(And they said curiosity killed the cat...)  
Hey, Kingdom Hearts, why is it rated so freakin low if there are gay guys in there? (Not that I mind, just worring about the younger people playing KH and KH2)  
Anyway, my apolagies about my rant, a sugar rush... sigh. Need to keep away from sugar... and chocolate...

Anyway, no disrespect intended,   
Tsubasa-Angel

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Tsubasa-Angel

He's smart, loyal, Sexy, Beautiful, funny…adorable at times and is not afraid to speak his mind around me. He's just…perfect for me in every way. I just hope I can be perfect for him.

Ever seen Yu-Gi-Oh? Well put it this way…That show has more homosexuals than Kingdom hearts even the women are gay…Ilixelm…I'd rather not know HOW Anzu and Mai 'get it on' thank you!

Apology accepted. It amuses me how sugar can make one so 'high'

No disrespect taken into account.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: CheshireCat o.Oo.O

Subject: Seven questions and a side note.

Side Note: Still in the process of finding the retard with Mansex on the brain. END SIDE NOTE:

Dear Xemnas,  
Here's a very personal question... Don't get mad, WHY ARE ALL THE HOT MEN GAY? Damn I cannot get a friggin break here!Cough moving on...  
1) Has Vexen actually come up with a solution to your being heartless yet?  
2) Does Saix have any tattoos? (what is my obsession with that question?)  
3) With the discrimination associated with two of the same gender coming together, what would you have to say to a discriminatory bastards with limited thinking capabilities?  
4) Do you promote free thinking in your organization?  
5) Is Saix REALLY a nice person or is that an act to fool the non wary?  
6) If I could give you my heart Would you take it?  
7) What was the most frightening movie that you have ever seen?

Your friend and ever faithful,  
The Cheshire Cat  
"The heart is fragile, but handle it the right way and there is no way to break it." (Laments of the Cheshire Cat)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Cheshire,

Much appreciated and I have no idea…

1) Not yet…He needs time and space…Ilixelm knows why…but for some reason…won't tell me.

2) I'm afraid I am not going to answer this.

3) This so dreadfully unprofessional: FUCK YOU World, I'm a Nobody!

4) Indeed.

5) -frowns- He is most certainly a kind loving nobody to which I am deeply in love with…ghost feelings that feel so real…

6) How do you mean by that…?

7) One of those Mary-Kate and Ashley chick flicks -shudders-

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas


	11. Chapter 11

From: _**Kyolove13**_

Subject: Questions

HELLO SUPER SUPERIOR,

Are you mad that your my 2ed fav member?  
Are you mad that Demy-chan is first?(pleas don't be mad...I still love you.)  
Your hair is awsome!!  
Can you help me with my nobody name?(real name Melanie.)  
Can tell my best emo friend Zexy-san I said hi?  
Can you put love?(evan if you can't love)

Thank you Superior Xemnas

Your fathful fangirl,  
Kyolove13

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Kyolove13,

Not at all…I know you love me…But don't feel disheartened that I can't love you for I love Saïx and isn't that important? Thank you…I love my hair too. I'm sorry I cannot help you here…But not fear…Xigbar is around somewhere…

Of course…I shall! I'm sorry that I can't…I don't want to upset my dearest Saïx.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**Tsubasa-Angel**_

Subject: Agreement and Questions

Xemnas-dono,  
- Oh, you should try it! Unless you don't like sweets, I won't suggest it. It mainly works when someone who likes eating sugar eats a lot of it! (Oh, and if I'm sugar high, I find that I type REALLY fast!)  
Yu-Gi-Oh... You have a VERY good point there.-shudder-  
Well, on with the questions!-  
I remember you saying that you thought Simple and Clean was beautiful, right? By Utada Hikaru? Ring a bell? Well, I want an explanation, really. I mean, was it the words that you thought beautiful, or the song, and do you mean the English version or the Japanese version? I, personally, think both of them are great!  
Anyway, I know this was random, but I LOVE giving you questions that YOU answer! Yay! Okay, calming down now...

Meaning no disrespect (I just LOVE putting that!)  
Tsubasa-Angel

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Tsubasa-Angel

I once ate some chocolate Sprinkles and Sea-Salt Ice cream…as a gift from Demyx and Ilixelm…It was err….interesting…I have never felt a sugar rush…but I should really stop drinking Sake. Indeed I do. -smirk- As for the songs. Both versions are beautiful. Thank you…I like to answer you.

None Taken

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**ArtemisBlack555**_

Subject: Seven Questions

Umm, Xemnas, I still think that Axel started the whole Mansex stuff...

1. What would you do after you got a heart? I would take over the worlds.  
2. Do you like cookies?  
3. Does Roxas annoy you?  
4. Do I annoy you?  
5. Does Ilixelm annoy you?  
6. Do you want me to go away now?  
7. OMG, I just thought of something! 1+78! Oh, eww, bad thoughts...

ehem, bye Superior!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear ArtemisBlack555

1) The first thing I would do is to express my love to Saix

2) No

3) Rarely…It's his best friend that drives me to the brink of insanity.

4) Not at all

5) Does my daughter annoy me? …Occasionally when she asks for something I won't let her have, then she goes and asks her other father: Saïx and she gets her own way…-shakes head fondly-

6) Only go when you want to.

7) …Ilixelm would be terrified…

Goodbye,

Signed,

Your superior and friend,

Xemnas

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: _**Taerga Live**_

Subject: Almost Everything

Xemnas,  
I've been wondering something. I just resently beaten KH2 for the second time and noticed something. You told Ansem the Wise that "Only a fool would be his appreantance." (Sorry about my horrible spelling skills...and I'm going to be an english teacher how?) You do realize that you just insulted yourself, Xigbar, Xaldin, Vexen, Lexaeus, and Zexion...right? Oh, and why is it anytime someone asks you to chose between two different foods, you always say Saïx's moonpie even though they were not a choice? Are they really THAT good? Can you teach me how to fight? When I was fighting you, I notice that you have an amazing fighting style. One more thing. You asked someone to try an figure out who came up with the whole "Mansex" thing. My thoughts are on either Sora, Mickey, or even Ansem the Wise himself. I mean, you DID steal the guy's name. Just consider it as pay-back from him. Just throwing the idea out there.  
Viel Glück findend Ihre Herzen!  
Ihr Freund und Stütze, Taerga Live

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Taerga Live,

Oh I did, didn't I? Still never mind…Saïx's moon is the best thing that happened me…(after our daughter, of course) I could I suppose…teach you how to fight, other than just pressing the 'X' button. That's interesting…

Translation please?

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**CheshireCat o.Oo.o**_

Subject: Three Questions

Dear Xemnas,  
Okay question number six is not in the romantic sense. If I had it in my power to relinquish my heart so that you may feel again. I would. Therefore If I could give you the capability to feel again, in other words give you my heart, would you take it? I would never try to steal you away from Saix. I like and respect BOTH of you too much to do something like that.  
1) Have you ever MET Sephiroth?  
2) What is your favorite Heartless?  
3) Whats your favorite food?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear CheshireCat o.Oo.o

Thank you, and of course I'd take your heart, it's about time someone respected us. Ilixelm has just added 'Aww…But I respect you Daddy' and is now currently hugging me…making it very difficult to type.

1) Once…let's just say…instinct took over and therefore I threw him out.

2) My Neoshadow named Yami

3) Saïx's Moonpie

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: crazed yaoi fangirl

Subject: Ranting and Questions

Hello Superior sir!!  
It's an honor:P Just for the record!! I do NOT! agree with Ms. Bubbles or whoever in chapter eight?? I happen to think both you and Saix are the two sexiest members.. :D And your love child i would imagine to be quite beautiful... Anywhoosle!! on to the questions!!

1) Who is the uke and who's the seme:giggles:  
2) Pepsi or Coke?  
3) whispers you have the awesomest sexiest hair!!  
4) Juicy Fruit or Big Red?  
5) How is it that nobodys can defy the natural laws of exsistance? None of you are supposed to exist, but then.. Here you are..  
6) Personally, I like the side of nothingness the best.. in the constant struggle between light and darkness... Nothingness is eternal. Light and darkness are both retarded because they don't realize that one cant exsist without the other... Without chaos, order cannot exsist, (vise versa) and so what's left in their wake is nothingness... Where do you think the whole grey area of nothing falls between these constantly battling sides?

Sorry for the rants!! but I just had to get it out!! And thank you for your time Superior. I know it's precious to you sir.  
bows respectfully

your humbled disciple,  
Crazed yaoi fangirl

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Dear crazed yaoi fangirl,

1) I am the Seme…Saïx is my beautiful uke.

2) Pepsi

3) Thank you

4) Big Red…

5) It is a question…even I have difficulty in the concepts of.

6) Indeed…I do not know…

You are most welcome and Thank you,

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas


	12. Chapter 12

From: _**CheshireCat o.Oo.O**_

Dear Xemnas,  
1) I am sure that this question has been asked but what did you do about Marluxia trying to take the organization from you?  
2) Xigbar told me that he would like a motorcycle. So I have the same question for you, Cars or Motorcycles?  
3) Why does everyone think that Zexion is EMO?  
4) I am getting clues from several sources on this page about possible MANSEX retards and Does Axel slip up and call you Mansex every once in a while? It might be him but I am actually leaning more towards Sora or Riku.  
5) Have you ever seen your Heartless? (You know Ansem from KH1)I mean your tan looks good on you but he is pushing it. Creepy Oo.  
6) Why are your chairs that High up? (I had a hypothesis about either a) It protects you from any outside forces trying to reach you. I mean how many people can scale a 25 to 30 foot chair that you know of, without warping. or b) Axel gets fire crazy and in an attempt to put out the flames Demyx has to flood the place.

One more thing, apparently I am getting some sort of Reputation with you guys because Xigbar knows who I am and says that you say I have very interesting sayings. I will take said comment as a compliment. And hope Marluxia doesn't hold it against me for asking question number one...

The Cheshire Cat  
"The day my sanity ran away was probably the happiest day of my life." (Strange happenings)

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Dear Cheshire Cat,

1) I gave him to the nice fangirl with the attic.

2) I would like a Stretch Limozine then I won't ever have to worry about my daughter or Saïx being seen.

3) He really does sit in the corner and cut his wrists I'm afraid to say.

4) Axel is always calling me 'Mansex' and then he corrects himself.

5) I'm not sure whether to be disturbed or flattered.

6) Actually…it's a bit of both.

Indeed it appears so.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S I still have my sanity…just about…

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From: _**Taerga Live**_

Xemnas,  
For the record, "Viel Glück findend Ihre Herzen!" means "Good luck finding your heart" and "Ihr Freund und Stütze" means "Your friend and supporter." Well, so says My friend takes German in school and I like different languages. (Hm...I guess I should at least ask a question...) If you could learn a different language, what would it be and why? (I am aware that in the different worlds, everyone convenently speak the same language.) Do you play video games at all? If so, what ones? Oh, and is there any way you could just start a rant for me? For some reason, listening to people rant is just fun for me. You don't have to. Okay, bye!  
Taerga Live

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Taerga Live,

Thank you, that is interesting. I would learn how to read Ancient Egyptian. Surprizingly, Ilixelm can speak, read and write it. Her Dairy is written in hieroglyphics and therefore I do not understand what she has written. This concerns me.

I have played Pokémon, Kingdom Hearts and many Final Fantasies. Although Luxord is the one you should talk to about games.

I do not rant…I do not digress and I most certainly don't get distracted…maybe that's why Ilixelm often feels neglected…I must pay more attention to her and possibly her diary….(If I can get Vexen to translate it) Oblivion only knows what sort of impurities have invaded her precious, delicate, smart, powerful mind.

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**Chibi Inuyasha Lover 4ever**_

Dear Superior,

1) I desperately want to give you a fangirl hug, but I'm afraid of what Saix will do to me... can you ask him that it's merely for fangirl purposes or something? I really don't want to ruin your relationship! PLEASE ASK! U rule! 8D  
2) Can I give Saix a hug for the same fangirl reasons I have for you?  
3) If you could destroy any world, which would it be? (besides Destiny Island)  
4) What shampoo do you use? Do you share it with Saix?  
5) Does my nobody name sound alright? (Ahlixa)  
6) Can I call you Pretty? (YOU FREAKING ARE! Same goes for Saix)  
7) I have a friend who likes Yuri too, do you think your daughter would want to meet him?  
8) Peach or Lemon ice tea?  
9) Can you imagine Saix with orange hair? (where did THAT come from?!?!)  
10) May I ask Saix for the recipe for his moon pie?  
11) How do you suppose you'll get your heart back once you complete Kingdom Hearts? Is your heart just going to magically fly down from it back to you or do you have to search through the mass of them all and trying out every single one?  
12) Can I be your friend? (starry eyes)  
13) As much as I fangirl about you and Saix, I'm afraid I love number 8... do you mind if I take him for about a year or two? (that is once I find him in a certain authoress' closet) :)

Lots of hugs on hold until you say the word,  
CIL4

P.S: what's a Seme and an Uke? o.O

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Dear CIL4,

1) You may give me a hug on the terms that my dearest number seven agrees and knows about it. Possessiveness runs in the family.

2) Indeed.

3) Disney Castle.

4) While Marluxia uses Herbal Essence…I use Darkness Paradox, although I do sometimes share it with my dearest number seven, his personal shampoo is called Luna Eclipse.

5) Its interesting…

6) No…I am masculine…possibly sexy and hot, not pretty. (Although I do agree that my number seven is extremely pretty)

7) Him…-twitch-…HIM!? -twitch, twitch- Hm…I would have to meet him first.

8) Although I tend to enjoy both, I prefer Peach Ice Tea. As it is not so sour.

9) OH my Kingdom Hearts NO!

10) …Well I suppose…however whether he'd give it to you is another matter.

11) I actually don't know…I am hoping my heart would just appear into me…

12) -smirks- I don't see why not…

13) Indeed…Its not like I would miss him…

Thank you,

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S You had better ask Ilixelm about that one…

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From: _**Verycrazygirl**_

To Xemnas

Just to let you know, I respect you, and your choices greatly  
Subject: questions

1) (for kingdom hearts sake, please no details) how on earth could you and saix create your daughter? Afterall you are both male (you don't have to answer this, just don't get mad)  
2) What is a moonpie?  
3) who would you call your friends in the organisation? (not including saix and your daughter  
4) would you like it if I give the whole of the organisation hearts for 24 hours?  
5) if so you should have a heart just after I read the reply :)  
6) I would like to join you if I can (power would be morphing)  
7) here's 50 dollors, treat yourself

sorry if any of these affended you  
Thank you for answering my questions superior

From a respectful fan  
Verycrazygirl

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Verycrazygirl

Thank you,

1) No, no its alright, She was the result of an experiment that Vexen helped with.

2) A pie made of melted marshmallows and sweet pastry decorated in chocolate sauce, with rare Ganlon berries.

3) Xigbar, Xaldin and Vexen.

4) …And how in The World that Never Was are you going to do that?

6) Finally….My Kingdom Heart.

7) Can this be converted into Munny?

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: _**SoraxNamine**_

Wassup Mr.Superior?

I have a few questions! Hehe.

1. What kind of pyjamas do you wear? Kingdom Hearts covered ones?  
2. WHY DID YOU ALLOW AXEL TO ALLOW THE RIKU REPLICA TO KILL MY BELOVED ZEXION?  
3. Where can I buy Saix's Moonpie?  
4. Are you supposed to be the strongest boss in the game- because my friend said that Sephiroth is stronger than you?  
5. Is Vexen really gay?  
6. What's your favourite Heartless?  
7. Have you ever had a go playing Demyx's Sitar?

That will be all. And remember-I LOVE ZEXION AND DEMYX AND AXEL!  
Oh! and- Are you my friend as well?

from

SoraxNamine

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: SoraxNamine

Indeed.

1) No comment…this is a strictly private matter and therefore none of your business.

2) Would you believe me if I explained it was an accident.

3) You may not…I will not allow you anywhere near my Saïx

4) For fear of loosing my temper I shall say: no comment

5) Indeed

6) The Dragoons

7) No…I wouldn't trust myself…

Great…now go find me me hearts.

Signed.

Your Superior

Xemnas.


	13. Chapter 13

Firstly: I would like to apologize to all of dearest fans who have been waiting for me to update…Millie Ishtar Motou has not been able to access the internet, despite the numerous death threats she received from her cousin Ilixelm…(Note to self: Must talk to Ilixelm about family respect!) Anyway…As you may be glad (or not so glad to know) She is not dead and will try her best to catch up with your questions thank you for understanding

Signed: Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

---------------------------------------

From: **Taxima**

My questions to the Superior.

First, thanks for your time with this. Okay

1) Aside from Superior, what kind of higher up name to you prefer? (Lord, Master, Boss, etc.)

2) Is Ilixelm an adopted daughter, seeing as that you're an open homosextual?

3) When you were fighting Sora and Riku, were you actually mutating/absorbing the entire World that Never Was to grow in power? If so, then DANG!

4) When in the final battle, your robe took on a new color and pattern, why?

Again thanks, and good luck to your future plans Lord Xemnas ( i think that has a nice ring)

Taxima.

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Dear Taxima,

1) All of those should suffice

2) She is not adopted, she is my own.

3) Of sorts…it is most complicated.

4) It symbolizes the darkness in the light…

You are most welcome and thank you,

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: **Cheshire Cat o.Oo.O**

Dear Xemnas,  
DEAR GOD VEXEN IS GAY? DAMMIT walks away Screaming I GIVE UP! I CANT GET A BREAK NO MATTER WHAT I DO!  
Oh well, I'm back.  
I would give Zexion a hug but I can't seem to find him. That and everyone that I have wanted to give hugs around here doesn't seem to want one.  
Moving on.  
1) Why is almost the entire Organization pissed off at Axel? What did he do this time?  
2) You said you went to Halloween town before, What was your costume?  
3) My (crazy) Friend wants to know if your a vampire. (o.O Don't ask me she just wants to know so that she can do a halfway decent fan fic.)   
4) How can I join Organization 13? And would you Accept me?  
5) Why does everyone seem to enjoy just jumping off that one skyscraper in the cityscape below the Castle that Never was?  
6)Since I do seem to be getting a reputation amongst Organization 13, What do they think of me?? What does your daughter think. (Ilixelm, you get +500 Cheshire Cat cool points for being Xemnas and Saix's daughter!)

I do believe I am getting close to the insane Fangirl with Mansex on the Brains. (my friend says she lives in Idaho? Again she's being silly)

Hope I haven't Disturbed or Upset you in any way asking the inane questions.

Your Friend and Disciple,  
The Cheshire Cat  
"As you can tell, I'm not right in the head. But its okay, I have come to terms with that fact."

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Dear Cheshire Cat,

I do believe that Zexion is straight…although he could be in love with his razor blade…I am not too sure on that one…Perhaps Lexaeus needs a hug…or Xaldin…those two are always around somewhere…

1) He is a trouble maker and upsets Marluxia's plants…

2) My Black and white Robe…I suppose you can't improve on horror

3) I am most certainly NOT a Vampire.

4) Die and become nobody…perhaps…

5) Because it makes us feel alive…

6) I think you're a very interesting girl to talk to and Xigbar finds you 'a cool dude' as for my daughter, she says thank you and that you are 'cool' too.

Thank you for the information…

Signed,

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S Another interesting quote…

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From: **Tsubasa-Angel**

Okay, I'm sorry I missed a chapter, Xemnas-dono! (Punching myself for doing missing one of your chapters)  
Ow... Didn't realize I was this strong, or maybe I bruise easily...?  
Well, anyway, I have ONE question for you, sadly. -sniff- I couldn't think of anything else! wah! T.€€T  
Okay, why do most, (or maybe all?) members in the Orginization have the letter 'X' in it? Your name has it, Your daughter, SaiX (notice the capital X. Meant for emphasise.)  
...! I just thought of another question!  
Okay, I was wondering, since I call you Xemnas-dono, I am thinking I should probably call Saix something along the lines of san, sama, or dono... What would you say, oh great Xemnas-dono?

Answer back quickly!  
No disrespect intended, or wanted, at all,  
Tsubasa-Angel

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Dear Tsubasa-Angel,

Do not hurt yourself; it is hardly worth the pain anyway…

I do not know why we have X's myself…

Saïx-dono…It is what most of Organization call him…

No Disrespect noted or given,

Signed

Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: **Zexion **

Superior, not to sound offensive, but why do you say I'm emo? I'm definitely not. The only times I've ever gone into a corner were because everyone was too loud and I couldn't read my books, and the only time I my wrists even get near a blade is when I'm spreading butter on toast. I hope you haven't been getting this information from Xigbar...

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Dear Zexion,

I have heard you cry at night but I do not think you are entirely emo, just do something about your hair, boy! That would be a start…

With all due respect,

Your Superior

Xemnas.

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From: **SoraxNamine**

Subject: Questions

Dear Mansex eh-hem, I mean Xemnas,

In answer to your letter I won't believe it was an accident.  
Anyway,

1. Can I be an Organization XI member?  
2. Do you know if Xigbar was a pirate when he was a somebody?  
3. Who do you hate most- Kairi or Namine?  
4. Do you like beer?

That will be all as I cannot think of any more questions.

No disrespect- (well apart from the Zexion incident),

SoraxNamine 

'When life gives you lemons, make grape juice'

ps. do you like my saying-i've got more!

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Dear SoraxNaime,

1. If you can pass the extremely difficult and challenging test and fall into darkness then maybe…

2. Xigbar is the harmonious one, he is one with the ninja and the pirate…for he is our Ninja Pirate…and we must protect him!

3. Good question…Naminé is bearable…So I would have to say Kairi…Not to mention Ilixelm is very good friends with Naminé.

4. No…I prefer Bacardi and Coke.

No disrespect noted.

Signed: Your Superior,

Xemnas.

P.S…that one makes no sense whatsoever…I suggest looking for some more reliable ones.

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From: **kyolove13**

Dear Xemnas,

Sorry if I disrespected you. Tell Siax I said sorry too... And yes,Siax is verry important. OK! On with the Q&A's...

Do you think Zexy is emo?  
Do you like doing paper work?(I would make Axey do it. But he might burne it...)

Your fangirl kyolove13

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Dear Kyolove13,

Apology accepted and I promise to do so. Of course Saïx is important! Extremely so! Anyway…moving on…

As to my previous comments…he CAN be emo…and that hair doesn't help things…

I do not mind…after all these things have to done…and yes there were a few "Daddy…Axel burnt my homework's…" From Ilixelm...but I had that sorted out…(I put Axel on trash duty for a month)

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From: **Crazed Yaoi Fangirl**

Hello Sir!! (bows)  
Thankies for answering my seme and uke question.. :D I was thinkin you woulda said it was too personal... :P I came up with this question when I was half asleep this morning!

uh.. In the real Ansem's journals (from kingdom hearts two)  
Ansem the Wise said he didn't know how you (when you were whole) opened the door that appeared in his basement... Since you have the memories, how did you do it?

2) Do you like playing with candles, or the melted wax? (no yaoi term meant, or you could answer in both thoughts.. :P)

3) Did you know that there are Vanillia, Strawberry, and Bannana flavored moon pies? maybe you could ask Saix to make some of those:P

4) If you could dress up any org. member as a girl in a frilly pink dress with all the make-up.. the whole chebang, who would it be?

5) Since I am resisting all urges to fiercely glomp you (which the torment is ungodly!) may I have a nice lil hug instead:D

Thank you again for your time!!  
Your faithful fan!  
the Crazed yaoi fangirl

p.s. I loved the idea with the quotes.. so I think I'll do that too.. :P And I think I may be able to help you out with that whole diary thing... :D I know Egyptian as well! Mwahahaha!!

"Don't follow in my footsteps.. I run into walls"

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Dear Crazed Yaoi Fangirl,

You are most welcome! I do not mind…besides if I hadn't told you…Ilixelm sure would have done…

It was simple really…Myde has upset Even's projects and I was incredibly annoyed with the arguments so I kicked the door in.

2. I love candles…especially a romantic dinner for two…under the beautiful full moon…

3. Yes I am fully aware of those…tell me have you tried ginger? Those are my favorite moon pies…

4. Saïx or possibly Demyx…they are cute in dresses.

5. Of course you may! -gives you a fatherly hug-

Your very welcome!

Signed: Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

P.S I'd like that very much and you seem quite intelligent.

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From: **Bashoulover**

um...HI sir-superior-mansex(oops sorry)-xemnas-sir!

1. What's the worst prank someone pulled on you?  
2. How did saix get that scar on his nose?  
3. If you were to pick chocolate or vannila icecream, what would it be?  
4. Can you tell vexen to make me an evil tap-dancing penguin?  
5. Have you ever had tea with Sephiroth?  
6. sorry just have to ask...Have ever played strip poker with saix and luxrod? If so, who won? 

Bashoulover  
(ps i'm a girl...pass that on to xigbar plz.)

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Dear Bashoulover

1. I once put a sedative in Xigbar's drink and left him naked in Demyx's room thinking Demyx would love to have a naked UKE Xigbar…the next think I know he's screaming; "HELP! MY POOR VIRGIN EYES!"

2. That's not for me to say…

3. Chocolate, with a sprinkle of Saïx's chocolate from the left over mixture of the moon pie…

4. Why would I ask him to do that? It's not like that would be very useful to me…

5. Once…he has a very, very long sword…collection! What where you thinking?

6. Yes…against Larxene, Luxord, Xigbar, Ilixelm and Saïx…Ilixelm got down to her underwear (to which point I told her to stop playing…and go to her room) Xigbar lost second, then Larxene, then Saïx then me and Luxord won…

Signed your Superior and friend,

Xemnas.

P.S. I don't see why that would…he's gay…

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From:** Saïx**

Dear Superior,  
Hello. How are things going in your captivity, Love? I am all right but missing you very much. These fans seem intent on knowing all the private details of our relationship...who's seme, who's uke, and all those other things. I was wondering, how much do you wish for them to know or not know?  
Yours for eternity,  
Saïx

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My Dearest Saïx…

I am fine, I am not being held captive, however I am rather enjoying myself. I miss you too my dearest and I think if we don't tell them who's what in our relationship, I believe our daughter will. So just tell them what they wish to know,

From your dearest Superior,

Xemnas

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From:** XemnasIsMyLover14**

Dear Superior Sir!!  
HI! I'm like your Biggest Fan! but ok on to the Questions!

1) hope this is not personal.. but how much do you wiegh? I really want to know!

thats all i can think of at the moment'-- lol but okay

Buh Bai!!for now!

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Dear ….Ahem…I am not your lover…

1. Odd question….I have no idea….never weighed myself…I'm muscular not fat…that's all I need to worry about.

Signed, Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas.

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From: **Kristina-16**

Hi Xemnas how your doing.  
okay i know this dosen't really have to do with you but saix said he would give me a hug if you allowed it so can he give me one and can you give me a hug to now that ithink about it plz

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Dear Kristina-16

Fine…-gives you a fatherly type hug-

Hope that cheered you up…

Signed, your Superior and friend,

Xemnas.

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From: **Taxima**

About my questions. Ignor the one about your daughter. I asked before reading all of your responces, but I'm up to date now.

Dear Taxima,

Glad I have cleared that up for you.

Signed, your Superior and friend,

Xemnas.

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From: **Lady Alionae**

Oh Xemmy, you amuse me so with your gesturing and obsessiveness and whatnot. Also, your and Saix's protective/possessive love of one another is strangely endearing. I have a lots of questions that I thought I might pose to you. However I realized that most of them would make you sic Saisai or your daughter on me, and although I am immune to magic, Saisai's claymore would still hurt, so... I'm just going to ask a few.

What is with the giant flying nobody thing that shoots missles? Seriously, that was just weird and random.

All the other Organization members have some sort of element or power, what is yours? I can't seem to figure it out. At first I thought it might be darkness, but all nobodies seem to have that power, so how lame would that be?

Lastly, Xaldin, who has recently been locked in my closet due to my holding his ginsus hostage would like to say hello.

Xaldin: Please get me out of here, she's crazy! And this closet smells strange...

Ehehe...yeah. No more talking for you Xaldy.

Love, Lady Ali

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Dear Lady Ali,

Firstly, I'd like to say, let go of Xaldin! He needs to go on a mission with numbers Zero, Two and Nine…so I suggest you let him go…or else Zero and Seven will come after you…secondly…

He is my loyal servant, sort of like my guardian…only more in monster form. Disrespected and feel the sharp end of my daughters Voodoo Sword.

My power is infinite. For it is the power of nothingness.

Hope that clears that up for you…

Xaldin? …get back here at once!

Signed, Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas

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From: **skulldevil**

Dear Xemnas,

I have only two questions for you, since i couldnt resist asking, but dont want to take up your time.

1:did you hav a lover before saix? if so, who?

2:has saix ever made you half moon cookies? you should ask him too. their very good.

signed,  
skulldevil.

(p.s. I have confrimed Axel and two other unknown people started the mansex thing. I have suspicions Riku was another. Ill get back too you later on this)

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Dear Skulldevil

1. I do not know if this counts…but as Xehanort, I had Aïs

2. Hmm…Voodoo cookies are quite nice…ask Ilixelm to make them for you, but I should ask Saïx to make half-moon cookies

Signed, Your superior and friend,

Xemnas.

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From: **Crazyazngirl**

Maxy is here!!

1) Can I join the organization?  
2) Can I kill- I mean hurt Axel for killing Zexion in Chains of Memories?  
3) Did you know you are my 5th favorite?

The first is Zexion, then Demyx, then Roxas, then Riku, then you!

Love,  
Maxy (You can call me Amy since you are on my favorite list!!)

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Dear Amy,

1) …Perhaps…-smile-

2) As much as number Eight gets on my nerves…I suggest you leave him alone

3) …Thank you…I think…

Signed, Your Superior and Friend

Xemnas

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From: **Verycrazygirl**

Thanks for answering most of my questions, and I appoligise for over reacting on my first question. Sorry I can't tell how I gave you lot hearts. And 50 dollors is 100 munny.

Ok questions

1) How did you like your day with a heart?

2) Can we be friends?

3) I would like to help you lot collect hearts, do you accept? (my power is morphing) (freely donates own heart)

Please reply soon  
Thank you for answering my questions

From a respectfun fan  
Verycrazygirl  
(Winds of dark change to come in your favor) Don't ask

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Dear Verycrazygirl

You are most welcome and don't you worry. You are forgiven.

1. I loved it! I never wanted to give it away…Ilixelm is so lucky to have a heart -coughs- Please Pardon my Out of Character...

2. I have no reason not to decline your offer…

3. I accept, I can do with all the help I can get!

Thank you

Signed Your Superior and Friend

Xemnas

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From: **BlackChoas105**

Dear Xemnas,

Normally I wouldn't have such random questions, but I've run out of questions, so:

1. I asked Xaldin this one, but maybe you can help me fill in some of the blanks: Which members of the organization control which types of nobodies?

2. You do realize that someone has taken several members of your Organization, including Xaldin, hostage, don't you? Are you going to leave them trapped by fangirls? Be warned, it's part of a scheme to kidnap all of Organization XI!

3. Aside from "Superior", what is your title in "Proof of Existence"?

Sorry for the lack of serious questions. And for the record, it was Axel who started "MANSEX", I don't mean to cause slaughter within your Organization, just thought you should know, and don't feel angry about Sephiroth being stronger, he's a hidden enemy and the embodiment of darkness, he's going to be nearly impossible!

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Dear BlackChoas105

Do not worry I have been asked far more random questions.

1. Look it up on Wikipedia…

2. …Oh No they do not! I shall send Ilixelm around at some point to try to release them…

3. I had no idea I had another title…

It's quite alright… and that is so old now…

Signed your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: **Chibi-Heartless**

Hello there, superior Xemnas sir! xD

I didn't know you had a Q&A...It's just something I'd never expect you'd to do; sitting here and answering questions from fangirls, etc etc...lol. I hope that didn't make you angry or anything...Alright, onto the questions! xD

1. How would you react if someone called you an 'Old man'...?  
2. What exactly DOES Kingdom Hearts do, after you've given it all the heart it needs, etc etc...? Does it grant you a wish or something? Just something me and a friend were thinking about...We're curious xD.  
3. Do nobodies HAVE a reflection? You say you aren't suppose to exist, therefore being nothing, but then again you're there in the flesh and yeah...Heheh...I hope that made sense...O.o

That's all, thanks for your time, sir! xD

Chibi-Heartless

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Dear Chibi-Heartless

1. I would just allow them to meet Ilixelm…she's over protective…I'm so proud.

2. I have my Kingdom Heart…I have my daughter…Sorry to talk in riddles…but…you know…

3. Yes we do…

Your Welcome..

Signed, Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: **Chibi Muffin**

Hello Sir,  
I only have one question, and it is almost kind of random. In theory, could Captain Barbosa and his crew join the Organization? I mean because they are neither living or dead...

Chibi Muffin

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Chibi Muffin…

Only when The Queen of Hell…lets Hell freeze over…

Signed Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas.

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From: **Verycrazygirl**

Please update this, it's very enjoyable and has many fans. -hands out a cookie of encoaragement- -waits exitedly for next chapter-.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Verycrazygirl,

At long last I've updated…please forgive the long wait.

Signed, Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

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From: **aNGel-LigHTniNG**

OH MY SEXY AND EXTREMELY HOT SUPERIOR! Many people think that your rants about kingdom hearts are annoying but I actually think their true and KH does deserves it. Also I don't like yaoi but since I saw this video of you and Saix with certaint other two nobodies that made that really funny, I will not bug ou. Though you really do have a good taste. Saix is indeed pretty handsome. Anyways on with the questions!

1. Were you the one who did the names of the Org. members?(Names like the chilly academy)  
2. if so, why did you put Axel's so damn long..? And Larxene's 'savage nymph' the word nymph means beautiful women. Does that means that you think she's beautiful?  
3. Also, Why does it Annoys you when people talk about sephy? Just admit that he's indeed faster and harder than you are... Im not saying you're weak.. just that it takes Sora more time to defeat him than you.

Now Im done before any of your family members intend to kill me.  
Angie  
PS. I LOVE YOU! Specially because you were the actual person to create the Org.XI II... And that makes me wish really badly that you had a heart...

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DearaNGel-LigHTniNG,

Thank you, I think…

1. Probably Xigbar or possibly Xaldin…when they were drunk…It was not me…

2. I haven't got a clue…and I personally think she's alright...but not my type…

3. …That's personal…all I'm saying is I'm a very protective father…

That's probably best…

…Thank you…

Signed, Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: **aXels-priinCesz**

Can i have a kiss?! D

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Dear aXels-priinCesz

Certainly not with a name like that…and what the name in Kingdom Hearts would my Lover think? Or my Daughter…She'd kill you first…then me…

Signed Your Superior and friend,

Xemnas

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From: **Taerga Live**

Xemnas,  
Hey, I just wanted to know. Do you know that on there are these links all over that when you click on them, people donate a heart to the Organization? If you did know, how do you feel about that. Also, do you know what worlds everyone came from? Everyone says that Demyx came from Atlantica, but I think I'm the only one who thinks he came from Argrabah. I mean, Sitars ARE Arabic. By the way, I love your eyes. Saix's eyes too. Actually, everyone in the Organization has really pretty eyes. Am I talking to much? If so, just hit me and tell me to shut up. Are you a procrastinator? (Sorry, random much) Now, I want you to answer this without saying "Saix's moon pies." What is your favorite food AFTER Saix's moon pies? That's all I can think of now. Thank you for taking the time an reading this. I have a feeling I got on your nerves though.

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Dear Taerga Live,

I did indeed, what a lovely idea…Demyx came from Atlantica…I know that for a fact…I think perhaps you should slow down. A procrastinator? I do not think so…I love Ilixelm's Voodoo Vindaloo curry…delicious!

Not at all…it's always nice to listen to my fans…

Signed, Your Superior and Friend,

Xemnas.


End file.
